Shit I Do: Lamb of God (a.k.a., Me)

We’re over a week into the fantasy baseball season, but I haven’t dusted off the keyboard to throw something up until now. The reason? My rosters stayed mostly intact from draft day, with a couple of moves here and there, but nothing too crazy. Of course, I’m aware that our loyal readers need something, anything […]

Fantasy Baseball Relief Pitcher Rankings 2015, or, “Tiers, Not Fears”

In the final installment of “Tiers, Not Fears,” we have landed at relief pitching. A lot of fantasy owners hate having to deal with closers, but not me. While you read a lot of “don’t pay for saves” idioms being thrown out there, the fact is, if you play in a league that uses closers, […]

Fantasy Baseball Starting Pitcher Rankings 2015, or, “Tiers, Not Fears”

We’re not even through March yet and already some notable starting pitchers have gone down with injuries. Yu Darvish and Zach Wheeler highlight the list, but believe that by the time the calendar turns to May, there will be a few more joining them on the DL. Yup, starting pitching is a bitch. Fortunately, like your mom, it’s a […]

Fantasy Baseball Outfield Rankings 2015, or, “Tiers, Not Fears”

Most fantasy baseball heads are of the belief that the outfield position is deep. If you play in a basic 12-team league that utilizes three OFs then sure; you can literally rotate streaky players in and out of your last outfield spot (or two) and get by. You don’t even have to really research the position like that. […]

Fantasy Baseball Third Base Rankings 2015, or, “Tiers, Not Fears”

There’s not much to say about the third base position. Here it is: 1) It’s not as deep as first base. 2) It is deeper than the rest of the infield offensive positions. 3) Like your mom, it’s top-heavy. 4) The fall-off of talent is precipitous when the ranks hit the 20s. Only time I cry? When it’s crocodile […]

Fantasy Baseball Shortstop Rankings 2015, or, “Tiers, Not Fears”

If you thought the second base position sucked, you haven’t had a chance to see this year’s crops of shortstops. I’ve seen some steaming piles of shit, but this is the steamiest pile I’ve peeped in a while.  Think going into a communal bathroom at your job and having to hold your breath the whole time […]

Is There Any More Room For Me In Jean Segura’s Bandwagon?

Fantasy owners have a short-ass memory. Entering drafts at this time last year, Jean Segura was considered just a notch below guys like Troy Tulowitzki and Jose Reyes. After a brutal 2014 season that saw him hit .246 with just five HRs and 20 steals, he’s being ignored more than a sensical plot device in Dexter. Clearly, […]

Fantasy Baseball Second Base Rankings 2015, or, “Tiers, Not Fears”

Raise your hand if you hate drafting for second base. I know most of you mu’fuckas got a paw in the air. The negative connotations surrounding second base center around the fact that the position traditionally has been weak for fantasy purposes. This year is no different. Sure there are some intriguing options that can […]

Homeless Heroes: Devon Travis

With his thumb in the air and a bandana full of worldly possessions on the end of his stick, Devon Travis enjoys his time as a hobo. He sees it’s the little things that count. The wind in his hair. A good night’s summer sleep by the bridge, with the gurgling of water serving as Mother Nature’s lullaby. […]

Fantasy Baseball First Base Rankings 2015, or, “Tiers, Not Fears”

The first base position is like your mom, it looks easy to fill, and in most cases it will wind up being a slam dunk; but one misstep could leave you with a serious case of blue balls. Yes, first base is (and forever will be) the deepest of the infield offensive positions in fantasy baseball. […]

Pearce of My Heart: The Steve Pearce Story

31-year-old Steve Pearce was just a regular joe. He played professional baseball. He probably had ho’s in various area codes (remember, he was a journeyman prior to last year). He made a blue collar-like $850,000 a year. Yup, a regular Bro Six-Pack, just like you or me. Things were going well enough for Pearce. But well enough […]

Eric Hosmer Sucks: The Sequel

I’m a bit of a trail-blazer when it comes to shitting on Eric Hosmer. I was on the case prior to the 2012 season, when Hos-mania was at an all-time high. My reasoning for his sucking back then was an unimpressive minor-league power track record, coupled with a modest rookie year that gave little reason […]