Team Names(1)

Funniest and Best Fantasy Baseball Team Names 2014

Your mom during her glory days
Photo Credit: CAVE CANEM


Let’s face it, really hilarious fantasy baseball team names are difficult to come up with. So rather than waste precious time trying to come up with names yourself, why not let your boy Dudley Do Work do it for you? Below are the best fantasy baseball team names for the 2014 season. They are also the funniest fantasy baseball team names of the 2014 season. How do I know they’re the best and the funniest? Simple, because the phrases “best fantasy baseball team names” and “funniest fantasy baseball team names” generate a shit-ton of hits on search engines. That may not have answered the question, but it didn’t need to. You’re here now. So join the Sons of Roto revolution and experience another Starbonell hand-crafted team names collection. 


As always, these names are 100% original and did not come from any other sources. There are no lazy team names or corny-ass puns chilling on this list. We don’t believe in filling in our list with mediocre names just to flesh it out. Nope. Just pure, unadulterated genius. As usual, we are welcome to any suggestions from readers. Be warned though: only the best reader recommendations will grace this list (with credit included). 


Get a condom on that brain of yours, because your mind is about to be blown.


More after the jump:


Sexual Team Names

The Backdoor Sliders

Eaton Mad Pussy

Fister Good Night

The Gap Hitters

German Scherzer Videos

Popping Ur Mom’s Mitt

She Took My Willingham

The Slabbed Camel-toes

Stick It In Her Buchholz

Suck My Foul Pole

Toe Ur Mom’s Rubber

Yanking Long Relievers

Your Mom’s Bush League (also works as a league name)


Advanced Stat Team Names

Hawking LOOGYs

ISO Horny

It’s Like wOBA

UZR Friendly

The Cool WHIPs

Traveling @ VORP Speed

WAR Children


Player-Based Team Names

The Ben Zobriety Test

Bridges of Madison Bumgarner

Case of ‘Ells Palsy

The Constant Gardner

Desmonds Are Forever

Divide and Conger

Fatherless Bastardos

Go in, Wei-Yin

The Hardy Hars

Having a Grandal Time

I Ain’t Nava Scared

Jhonny’s Mom Can’t Spell

J.P. Howell Movements

Kith and Kinsler

Kristopher Negron? Please

Lawrie and Order

Longorias Bastards

Mauer Patch Kids

Me Lose? Yadier Mind

The Nava Hoes

Never Bogaerts Da Blunt

The Newborn Infantes

Never Beg For Headley

Not real evic, Bogusevic

The Pagan Angels

Pence Up Agression

Profar, So Good

Rajai Against Da Machine

The Roast Beef Andrus

Sporting Hammel-toe

Straight Cashner Homie

Sweet (Bruce) Chen Music

Taillon My Wayward Son

Want 2 Touch the Heisey

We Doing Aoki

We Shin-Soo True

Werth Two Furbushes

Whoa (Dylan) Bundy!

Ur Mom Got a Kluber Foot

You Medlen Kids


About Starbonell

Starbonell is the co-founder of Sons of Roto and one of the most insightful and colorful fantasy analysts in the game. Mixing intelligent and well-researched advice with an entertaining style of writing that is easy to digest, Starbonell is the king of info-tainment.